What I learned from dying: No bones about it, cancer stinks

Jamie and Dave

So apparently my bones are being slowly eaten away by cancer. I don’t like it.

My most recent CT scan showed that the cancer in my spine, hip and shoulder have all grown and they’re causing me pain in those spots because there are gaps or missing bone in places. But there is good news. The cancer in my liver has continued to shrink, and that’s the cancer that’ll kill me. The bone cancer will just make me wish I didn’t have bone cancer.

When I was much younger I heard about man who died of bone cancer and I remember people telling me how awful it is to have bone cancer and how it must be one of the worst ones to have. Now it seems like it’s no big deal.

My doctor talked about the growths on my bones in a very matter of fact way, simply saying that it made sense that I’d have the pain I was having but that radiation would take care of it. My radiation oncologist the next day told me my hip might be susceptible to breaking but that they could stick a rod in there and I’d be walking the next day.

I guess it’s easy to say all this when it’s not your own bones that are being eaten to dust.

When I was first told that the reason I was having pain was because the cancer had grown I was very scared that it meant I’d no longer be comfortable enough to sleep and that my driving and walking days were almost over. But it sounds like they’re not, although breaking a hip doesn’t sound like anything fun.

On Wednesday I’ll be getting one dose of radiation for my bones, which the doctor says is enough to stop the pain in most people. I don’t know if it means the cancer will stop eating away my bones or if it just means it’ll stop hurting but I guess either option is preferable to what I have going on now.

And there is still that part about the good news. I’m blessed beyond anything that I deserve to be told that my dangerous cancer is still shrinking.

It gives me hope that one day I’ll be able to go back to work and get on with living without the looming prospect of death hanging over me. I’m praying for just that.
dave.hancockclarion@gmail.com

By Dave Taylor