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Stage 4 cancer

What I learned from dying; I might be going bald

  Soon, allegedly, the sun will feel a little hotter, breezes will be just a bit tougher to notice, and my shampoo bill will plummet. I’ve been told that on this new chemo treatment I have anywhere from a pretty good chance to a who knows how good a chance at losing my hair. I…

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What I learned from dying; Now I lose my dog?

It’s been an excruciatingly long, hard week. On the same day that I finished up a column about how doctors considered my being alive a miracle, I had an appointment with my oncologist where one of the only things I remember him saying is “what we’re doing isn’t working anymore.” That means that Keytruda, the near-miracle…

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What I learned from dying; Just a little bit more

Tuesday I was tired, like, can’t sit up straight tired. I was on the sofa leaning over, struggling to seem like I was even alert. Truth be told, I stay that tired most of the time, but this time it turned into a lesson that I thought I’d learned years ago and apparently hadn’t: a…

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What I learned from dying; everyone needs a Jamie

After a long string of seemingly only good news, I finally got some bad news this week. My white blood count was too low to do chemotherapy chemotherapy so I was sent home from the hospital to try again next week. When I first heard the news I sighed and thought, “there’s no easy or…

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What I learned from dying; How to live intentionally

I learned two lessons this week in two very different ways. First, I learned that when faced with a dire situation like stage 4 cancer, I must live very intentionally and choose each day – and each moment – to not let it overwhelm me. Second, I learned that when dry heaving into a trash…

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What I learned from dying; I’m weaker than my woman 

I learned a humiliating fact about myself a couple of days ago. I’m weaker than my girlfriend. I’ve always considered myself stronger than I looked, even now, so although I’ve lost around 90 lbs from my usual weight I felt like my core strength was still in there somewhere, even if it were hiding pretty…

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What I learned from dying; Good news and bad news

My long promised update is finally here and it’s a mixture of good news and bad news. The good news is that my cancer spots are shrinking, some of them substantially, but the bad news is that in finding out the spots were shrinking I found out there were more of them than I realized.…

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What I learned from dying; Men can be sick too

I told my girlfriend Jamie to get pictures of me working during my chemo treatment Monday but that I didn’t want them to be posed. I didn’t get much work done and she got a picture of how the day really went. This third round of chemo has been rough and the main thing keeping…

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What I learned from dying

W Last Tuesday I found out that I have stage 4 gastric cancer that has spread to my liver. I think this means I’m dying. But being a journalist, I can’t pass up the opportunity to tell the story of a man whose life and plans might be cut short unexpectedly, so this column will…

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